Some will advocate that grit and determination are the keys to perseverance. For some people and some situations that may be true. But if you don’t want to always rely on the white-knuckle approach, it pays to dig a bit deeper into perseverance so that you have other ideas to tap into.
Goals and Perseverance
Clearly there is a relationship between goals and perseverance. Google either term and you’ll come up with stories and examples of perseverance and setting goals. Before just jumping into those examples, it may be helpful to understand what you’re really trying to accomplish. Sometimes goals can be the objective and sometimes they are the tool.
I wanted to become a private pilot. It is difficult balancing work and family and finding time to fly. But, I knew I wanted to reach the goal; that is what mattered and it was going to take perseverance. I looked up strategies on how to overcome challenges like the ones I was facing, things I could do differently to find more time, and things that would help me persevere. I did achieve my goal, partly through perseverance and partly using a lot of other time management strategies.
However, there are other times when a goal is just the tool. For instance, I enjoy running and I like doing it regularly; but, I don’t keep at it unless I have a goal such as a race that I’m training for. When I complete the race, I feel good about reaching my goal, but the objective is really to run regularly. The goal isn’t important, perseverance is.
Is this just semantics? Maybe, but differentiating what’s important can help you find ways to persevere with the thing that is important to you. When thinking about this, experiment with the interplay between goals and perseverance. You might get stuck trying to set a goal that is just right. Remember, goals can change based on what you learn and how things proceed. Do you just need to start moving or keep moving? Set some small goals that are easily achievable. When you accomplish a goal, even a small one, your brain releases a shot of dopamine. You will feel good and will be more likely to keep pressing on.
More Tricks to Play on Yourself
I’m sure you’ve experienced times when you know the next step is going to be tough. Maybe you’re trying to exercise regularly, but you know you’re going to waver in your motivation in the morning. One trick is to spread out your workout clothes so they are ready for you first thing in the morning. When you see them, you’re more likely to put them on and go do the workout. This trick works for any life situation, not just exercise. Next time you think you might waver in your resolve, just do the first step. Start writing the paper, select the tools you need for a home improvement project, or, do the first part of a work assignment. Do the first step and you’ll find it easier to keep going.
Recently I’ve started swimming with a group and some of the sets we do are long. So long that in the middle of the set I start wondering if I’m going to drown. In those times I decide to sit out a lap and take a little break. My head clears, my breathing recovers, and I can rejoin the group and finish the set.
Sometimes in the middle of a journey you’ll start wavering and be tempted to quit. However, that is not the right time to make that decision. Metaphorically speaking, pull over and take a little break. Stepping out of the work will give you some perspective and then you can decide if you’re able to keep going or if some other change is needed.
Think Critically About Inspirational Stories
I have to confess, I’m a sucker for inspirational stories. I watch these videos and even though I know I’m being manipulated by a director, I’m holding back tears. Sometimes I need that cathartic release to balance myself. However, when it comes to perseverance, I want my greatest source of inspiration to come from inside me, so I try and stay objective about how I use inspirational stories for motivation.
When reading a story of perseverance, like JK Rowling that I referenced last week, don’t be distracted by the outcome of their story. Your destination will likely be different. Instead, focus on the journey and how they persevered. Understanding someone’s journey will help you remember it wasn’t easy for them at a time when it isn’t easy for you.
Ideally, the stories you turn to when seeking inspiration for perseverance should be something you can relate to. Even if it isn’t a direct correlation, find parts of the story you can genuinely identify with so you can contemplate what it must have been like for them to really persevere through their circumstances. Situations you can imagine and expand upon will have greater power for you during tough times than an emotional response garnered through creative editing.
Perseverance for the Sake of Perseverance
Sometimes you just have no idea where you’re going or why you’re doing it… like starting a blog and a weekly email! Maybe you have some things like that in your life? I kind of hope you do because I think there is some value in persevering for the sake of perseverance. You never know if some activity or adventure is going to take you to a new place unless you persevere.
There are also times when persevering is the right thing to do. Doing the right thing is always the right thing. You don’t need goals or aspirations to justify persevering, but it is also important to not just go through the motions. Make the effort to dig in and find deeper values and meaning.
Take Jerry Maguire. He was going to persevere because it was the right thing to do. It took Dorothy demanding more, that he needed to persevere in giving his whole self to the relationship.
Jerry: Well — I’m not the guy who’s going to run. I stick.
Dorothy: I don’t need you to “stick.”
Jerry: What do you want from me? My soul?
Dorothy: Why not? I deserve that much.
When you have something you give your all to, it is hard. You’ll get hurt. You’ll want to quit. You’ll want to change things and avoid that hurt and hardship. I hope you don’t, though. I hope you persevere and achieve all your goals and ambitions for your relationships and your life.